Why is it that when I sense a leading from God and follow through, the resulting consequence so heavily determines my hindsight? For example, if things naturally fit together and all goes well I am confident that I indeed heard God. Alternately, if things fall apart or blow-up in my face, I suddenly am stricken with a rash of questions about whether I heard God at all. My judgement of success and failure is quite irrelevant in God’s purposes, yet I behave as though it were paramount. If I judged consistently by this kind of standard, I would be forced to conclude that Jesus’ life ended in total failure. He died without conquering Rome or even the Pharisees who dogged Him night and day. Did he miss God in it? Of course not. And this is a major problem in my life, for Jesus told us we would have trouble in the world, yet I judge any “trouble” as a sign I have missed God. So how can a theology wrapped around my judgments of life be fruitful? Where do I turn when everything goes wrong? Read the rest of this entry »